Those Everyday People: Slice of Life March challenge #2

 Those Everyday People

I walk by my everyday people each morning. I know their stories well. Not really. Really, I have completely made them up. Yet, I mostly believe them. When I tell them to myself so often, my truth is stronger than the actual one I do not know.

There is the older man all in brown. Brown pants. Brown coat. Brown hat. He is gentle and smiley. He moves quietly and sure footed. If he walked in the forest, his footsteps wouldn’t make a sound. He always says good morning and returns my smile. I am sure he is a man of routine. His shoes have an exact spot on a rack. He never kicks them off. He walks at the same time, shops at the same time, rests at the same time. His wife is tired. She rarely joins him but they share morning coffee every day, each sipping and looking elsewhere. When he walks, he thinks of what must be done. Sometimes, he surprises himself and remembers things he thought he had forgotten. His route is long. His morning walk takes time. He never misses a day.

There is the gangly boy. A teenager actually. He has two siblings. An older brother, a more serious and wiry version of him. A younger sister, energetic and bouncy, clearly a girl in a boy’s house. Most concerned about being seen, being heard, not missing anything. Sometimes these siblings walk together. There is easy banter and comfortable silence. Usually, though, my boy is alone. He gives me sideways smiles, acknowledgement that he sees me often. I wonder about his school day. I am sure his mind is often elsewhere – happy daydreams, not teenage melancholy. I think about his parents. I am convinced that their mornings are full of bustle and busy. My boy looks happy to be walking in his own space, in the big world, with no rush around him that he needs to acknowledge. He looks like he knows the freedom a simple walk alone affords him. I imagine his Mom and Dad, lugging overstuffed bags, spilling full travel mugs of coffee, arguing over who remembered and who forgot the daily things that must be attended to. Their son, meanwhile, lopes along, quite carefree, open to a new day.

There is the lady in the pink raincoat. It’s Vancouver. She wears it often. Her boots are practical. She always has an umbrella even if it just hints of rain. I don’t really think about where she is going or what she might do there. Her pace is determined but she carries with her an aura of where she has been. She lives in an apartment she has had for years. It is plain and dull on the outside. Inside it is tiny and hers. There are windows of succulents. Shelves full of books. A kitchen full of tea and spices and bowls of oranges. She has favourite chairs at different times of day. She sits in the kitchen in the morning, drinking hot tea and making lists. Her evenings are spent curled up on her couch reading, thinking, studying. If she is home in the day, she sits in her window and watches people walk by, noticing their movements more than their faces. This is not her forever city. She is here to get something done. Soon, she will return to a place full of sisters and neighbours and friends. When she walks down the street there, she will always say hello.

These are my everyday people. I know who they might be.

Bad Irony: Slice of Life

I am participating in the Slice of Life challenge to write and publish a post every day in March.

Slice of Life is hosted by Two Writing Teachers. I thank them for the community they provide. Read more slices here.

Threes and Repeats: Slice of Life March challenge #1

 Threes and Repeats

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I write in threes and repeats, choosing rhythm over rules.

I overuse fragments. Throw dashes where I pause.

Certain words weave their way in often: celebrate, honour, joy, quiet. These are the truths I want to capture.

I write like I am puddle jumping down a steep hill.

Leap. Leap. Step, step, step. Pause. Consider. Leap.

I write to hint at what I can’t always say. Not publicly. Not really. Not with full abandon.

I write to process the things that follow me around like an irritating pixie. Poking me. Waking me up. Nibbling at my toes saying, “Pay attention to me.”

I write to remember what I might try to forget.

I write to bring tears that will not come.

I write to be here.

I write in threes and repeats.

I write.

Bad Irony: Slice of Life

I am participating in the Slice of Life challenge to write and publish a post every day in March.

Slice of Life is hosted by Two Writing Teachers. I thank them for the community they provide. Read more slices here.

The Promise of a Day: Slice of Life

Promise of a Day

We can’t measure the promise of a day in the good luck moments of a morning.

We don’t find it in the right bright sun.

Or in the still calm.

The lack of sirens, honks or shouts don’t hint at anything.

Looking for signs as we trace our regular routine route from many a morning before is also futile.

It’s not in the full cup of coffee. The wiped clean board. The stacks of notebooks, ready.

It isn’t in the quiet. In the noticing. The hoping.

It isn’t hiding waiting to be found.

The promise of a day doesn’t know itself.

It doesn’t announce its arrival in advance.

It doesn’t whisper or yell, “I am here. Notice now.”

The promise of a day is felt in moments. There is a shiver, an extra breath, an extended minute.

When it happens, you will know. Even if sometimes, you hesitate.

But absolutely, the promise of a day is known as night falls.

You have collected it in your arms like a snuggly child. A pile of warm laundry. A stack of tippy books.

Now when you pause and give it your full attention, it unravels and reveals all of its intricacies.

It was possible all along.

In the frustrated sighs.

In the timid smiles of pride.

In the tiny moments of kindness.

It was there when you smiled. When you laughed instead of roared. When you listened instead of talked. It was there when you nodded at a question not spoken aloud. In the little hand that reached for yours. When your response held no judgement. When you welcomed forgiveness.

The promise of a day will happen again. Tomorrow.

Bad Irony: Slice of Life

Slice of Life is hosted by Two Writing Teachers. I thank them for the community they provide. Read more slices here.

The kid on the piano: Slice of Life

The Kid on the Piano: Slice of Life There's a Book for That

That kid on the piano, right at the top, he’s my kid. My student. He should be upstairs right now, in my classroom. But instead, he perches atop the piano in the downstairs hall. The piano that gets wheeled back and forth into classes when music happens.

Not a good idea, sitting on top of the piano. At the very, very top. But really, kinda brilliant. When you don’t want to run back outside and you couldn’t get ahead of that adult trying to herd you upstairs, climbing up there must have made pretty good sense.

They will try to talk you down. But nice and calmly. Nobody wants to be responsible for a child falling or a piano being damaged. If you can dent a piano by climbing about on it. Who knows? They seem to be pretty sturdy things. And 8 year olds aren’t all that solid.

That kid atop the piano, he’s angry. And sad. But he’s just going to show you the angry. It comes out loud and stormy and stompy and it involves a lot of knitted eyebrows. That kid has the most expressive eyebrows.

Good luck to those trying to talk him down. His part of the conversation will sound like “No!” at various volumes for quite some time.

“Do you want me to help you down?”

“No!”

“Do you want to go for a walk?”

“No.”

“Should we go see what your class is doing?”

“NO!”

“Okay . . so do you want to help me . . .?”

“No!”

It’s going to take some time. Some time and some space. Some time for quiet. The adult will need time for something clever and persuasive. Think, think, think. That kid, he needs his head to slow down. Calm, calm, calm.

He is going to focus on the fact that everyone is mean. He is going to perseverate on being blamed. Not fair. Not fair. Not true. Not fair. When a moment of sad or scared sneaks in, he is going to get madder. And grumble and yell a bit.

His foot will start tapping the wood. Piano wood. Piano wood that shouldn’t have tapping feet. He won’t notice he’s doing it until the adult can’t notice anything else. Then he will do it more and harder.

Staring him down won’t work. Remember the eyebrows? They will win. Distracting him might. If it doesn’t feel contrived because he’s pretty clever. Just don’t let him know that that tapping is really making you nervous. Your upset is easier than his upset and he will be drawn to it.

This is the time you need to hope for someone to walk by. A younger kid, not an older one. An older one will make him feel shame and a lot angrier all over. He will pull up his feet and precariously balance in a huddled heap. Where huddled heaps aren’t meant to balance.

A younger kid might look at him in kind of disbelief and genuine awe. It won’t be intimidating. He might even say, “Nothing” when he’s asked what he’s doing up there. He might not even grumble it.

This is the time for that persuasive brilliant thing the adult has been thinking about. He’s distracted. He’s out of his head. Give him a yes or no question that lets him leap down and follow you. Don’t turn around to see if he does it. Trust that he will and he might.

Walk him for a bit and then give him a job. Don’t talk to him. Narrating nonsense on your walk is fine. Comment on the sunshine. The peeling paint. The shiny waxed floors. Give him something to notice.  A place to put his attention. Then give him something to carry. Up and down the stairs for a while.

When he complains, he’s ready to go to class. The kids won’t know he just sat on top of the piano for quite a while. And he’s not going to tell them. He can slip in and join in with their building. They will notice his arrival. Notice and go back to stacking blocks. One of them will nudge the bin closer to him. He will stack too. And lose himself in the chatter and the bustle and the noisy blur of playtime.

I stand there and watch him for a minute.

Shining in the sunshine coming through the windows.

I see the bright energy return under those stormy eyebrows.

The kid who spent part of the afternoon on top of the piano. That’s my kid. My student.

Bad Irony: Slice of Life

Slice of Life is hosted by Two Writing Teachers. I thank them for the community they provide. Read more slices here.

 

Bad Irony: Slice of Life

Bad Irony: Slice of Life

3:30 p.m. Monday. The office is empty. But for one girl. Two teachers. Multiple phone numbers where no one is answering.

The walking-her-towards-home-conversation-sound-bytes:

One of us: “We’ll check the program then if that’s where you think you are supposed to be.”

Her: “Yeah. I think I just forgot.”

One of us: “You walk this way every day?”

Her: “Yeah. But not by myself  . . . not mostly.”

One of us: Noticing. “Wow. That’s a lot of garbage down there.”

Her: “Yeah. The bad people leave it there.”

Her: “Hey! Are those cameras?”

One of us: “Yes. Looks like they are shooting a movie.”

Her: “My building will be famous! I’m so lucky!”

Both of us: (Deep Breath)

One of us: “So the people at your program are expecting you? We should try there first?”

Her: “Yeah I think. You can’t go up in my elevator. Not without a key. Oh! Oh no.”

One of us: “What is it?”

Her: “I was just thinking about when I walked here Friday.”

One of us: “Oh?”

Her: “There was a bad guy. He followed me and (insert name here).”

One of us: (Breathe) “Really?”

Her: “Yeah. So they had to call the police.”

One of us: (Breathe deeper) “Really??”

Her: “Yeah.”

One of us: “And?”

Her: “I think they came. There’s lots of bad guys.”

One of us: “Oh.” Because, yes, there are.

Her: “That’s the door. I can go alone now.”

One of us: “No, we’ll walk you in. We need to check.”

Her: “And because of the bad guys.”

One of us: “And because of the bad guys.”

The walk back.

Both of us shake heads. Bemoan the world. Share various expletives. Quick and sharp. Walking back to our safe, not back there, adult world and as we shake off her back there, not safe, childhood home.

Really? Really! Really. 8 years old. Her all but 6 hours life. The not at school life. The can’t make it up life. The where are the eyes and the outcry and the why life?

At the base of the bridge, we are asked to wait. A scene is in progress. Dark clothes. Shady characters. Filming “bad guys” it looks like.

When we walk by, the actors smile.

And we smile back. Both of us, as we shrug off the guilt, the outrage and the sorrow.

Fast forward.

You can watch the made for TV movie. The one about bad guys with her building as a back drop.

You won’t watch her story. Her everyday, all but 6 hours, childhood. The one where she feels lucky her building is famous. And we feel lucky we watched it in a movie.

Deep breath.

Bad Irony: Slice of Life

This is the second week that I have joined the welcoming community of writers hosted by Two Writing Teachers. Read more slices here.

 

Slice of Life: Should Be

At this time of night I shouldn’t be anything. But sleeping.

Instead I circle around in to the too tired to do any of it and the too tired to admit it place of should be . . .

Should be tidying. Should be planning. Should be list making. Should be tackling a pile.

Children should be counted – two of them in beds, devices captured in the land of our room, lights off. A nightly dance that should be easier. Because it sounds almost the same every night.

I should be able to admit that no, I don’t have 5 minutes of energy left to do anything. Not the emails. Not the laundry stack. Not the swooping through the house turning off lights someone else turned on.

Not this very blog I shouldn’t be writing.

Teeth should be brushed. Book should be found. Small lights on. Bright lights off. Settling should be happening.

I am like a persistent toddler. A stubborn teenager. A lonely puppy. Resisting sleep for no good reason.

I should know better. I am old and sort of wise. But in this overtired state in my over busy world, I am beyond reason and beyond action. Feebly, I protest my inability to be on top of it all by sitting ridiculously unproductive in the middle of it, when really, I should call it. Done for the day.

Should be sleeping. Should know better.

Should be.

Slice of Life

I am excited to finally join in the wonderful community hosted by Two Writing Teachers. Read more slices here.