In this month of writing, there comes a point where strangely, I begin to miss words.
Writing requires the active arrangement of words on the page. We must come at it thoughtfully. There is no vague. It is about precise. Even in vague images there needs to be an exactness about directions the reader might go. There isn’t much room for breathing. We offer space between the words but we can’t take any of that space for our own. Breathe quick and find the next word. Lay it down. Carefully. Make a path. Lure the reader down it.
I am so tired of my words. I am bored by them. I am lost in them. It’s not calming. It’s irksome. It itches. It irritates. I want to pull a large blanket over my head and hide. I want to hear nothing from me.
I need to go read. Pages and pages of words that I don’t need to organize. Words that I can ignore or scrutinize. Words that can lead me away. Or lead me within. Or take me around and around and around and it’s okay if I end up nowhere and have only had the journey.
I am missing words. From other people’s stories. I want the time to step into another life. To turn around and look at it from multiple perspectives. I want to be able to notice the amazing of word choice that makes a moment. I want the chance to not be conscious at all. To not be aware of why I was knocked over by a section of text that held me and spun me and whirled me around. I want to stagger away and be transformed.
Through words, I want to feel. To be moved. To become tangled up and not need to weave the way out.
I need time to be reading.
To be changed by a story.
The chance to forget to breathe. And then to cry. To feel everything inside someone else’s head.
I want to examine another life and know how little and how much I know.
I am missing words.
I am participating in the Slice of Life challenge to write and publish a post every day in March.
Slice of Life is hosted by Two Writing Teachers. I thank them for the community they provide. Read more slices here.
There's a Book for That 
I hope you find lots of time to read during the spring break. You write beautifully even when you are lost for words. I think you are a word whisperer, and the words, the most timid ones included, eat out of your palm.
You might be tired of your words, but I, for one, am not. The way you’ve personified your words makes it so interesting to read, so lifelike, that I am jealous (in a good way!). I too, am tired of my words but if my words were your words, I’d lay them down on a blanket and roll in them. This was amazing. Thanks for sharing!
Terje phrases it beautifully- I know I am richer for reading your words! I also feel I read too little in March when I am writing daily- I do not know how others make time for both. I am hoping my break throws the balance back and hoping yours does too.
Yes, we need to read more, to write deeper. All of us. Still, often it is at that point of frustration with our own writing that something new comes along to spark the magic. The key is to be open to that unexpected moment, and be ready for some paths that seemingly go nowhere. They go somewhere.
Kevin
It’s the mid point of March and the challenge, and I woke up to write…but sick of my own words, too. That’s the challenge, though, of writing – to find our own words we must read, yes, but also just struggle through the muddle of our own.
Wow! This is so beautifully written and from the heart. I, too, feel overwhelmed often. Writing is so hard–even leaving a reply can be a challenge. Yes, go to the books. Read. Be inspired. We can all profit from reading your post. Thank you.
Your beautiful piece makes me reflect on my own reading. I read avidly but quickly and only recently do I slow down enough to notice a beautiful word choice or phrase. I am sure my reading contributes to my writing, but most likely it could contribute much more if I became more aware of author’s craft while I read. Thanks!
You are missing words, yet still communicate so well with them! I am always amazed at your ability to evoke emotion with your writing. I hope you find inspiration in your reading today.
Sometimes we just get tired. I read vacation books then. Maybe letting others words flow over you will smooth you like a pebble in a stream.
From my “reading” of others’ words above, it seems that you’ve mirrored a feeling others are experiencing too, grabbing at straw posts, anything to have something to write. Wishing you a Sunday with words from a favorite book!
You captured exactly what I felt last week!
I hope you have a good book available.
This. Once again. I, too, am tired of my own words, tired of trying to pull together some words to say something that will be worth saying, worth the time that others spend reading and commenting. There is purpose and rightness in a daily writing challenge, but there is also a need to breathe as a writer, to sit and think and wonder and read many, many other words before we are ready to write our own.
Wow, I am feeling this way too right now. Working on my National Boards, drafting a new manuscript, and slicing/commenting every day. My focus has been on writing and as you said, “Writing requires the active arrangement of words on the page. We must come at it thoughtfully. There is no vague. It is about precise.” I am dying for some time to appreciate how others are doing with that! Thanks for this post.
I hope you find your way into the words you need. Thank
Thank…you for your words. Especially: “Make a path. Lure the reader down it.” “It’s irksome. It itches. It irritates. I want to pull a large blanket over my head and hide.” “I was knocked over by a section of text that held me and spun me and whirled me around.” and most especially “Through words, I want to feel. To be moved. To become tangled up and not need to weave the way out.” I know exactly how that feels as a reader.
I need to go read. Pages and pages of words that I don’t need to organize..such an interesting concept…wanting to be with words but not in charge of the organization. I love how you so clearly named the connection between reading and writing. I know I write better, because I read. I know I read better, because I do write. I know I will work on my organization of words in my future slices because I read your slice. Thank. Now enjoy a good book. I just finished and enjoyed A Man Called Ove – funny and words organized well, in my opinion.
We spend so much time writing and reading slices that we don’t spend as much time reading–that’s true! Your rhythm in your writing is as always so powerful. I hope you use your writing as mentor texts with your students for how to use short sentences to change pace and maintain reader attention.
Ditto all the above. I am so glad I read your post today; the last one before I log off (after almost 2 hours of reading and trying to comment thoughtfully). You are a “word meister”; that is perfectly clear. Yet you yearn to restore your well. But your description of your yearning is so artfully written that we all hung on every word. I hope you somehow find the time to replenish because we all love reading YOU so much!
Your words are beautiful. Have you read Fredrik Backman’s My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She’s Sorry? Word.
I go through this a lot myself… My own writing seems so bland and boring. I can assure you yours aren’t boring to the reader!
I am passionate about poetry. When I feel like this, I turn to poets I love. Poetry doesn’t take much time, but it may be the answer to you call for words. Of course, despite your cry, this was a beautifully written post. Your words are not lost on me.
Indeed. Today I read a 416 page book and wrote a six word slice, and I’m feeling much happier!